Captain Tractor - The Last Sakatchewan Pirate lyrics

Well I used to be a farmer and I made a living fine
I had a little stretch of land along the CP line
But the times went by and though I tried the money wasn't there
And bankers came and took my land and told me fair is fair
I looked for every kind of job the answer always no,
"Hire you now" they'd always laugh, "we just let twenty go"
The government, they promised me a measly little sum
But I've got too much pride to end up just another bum
Then I thought "who gives a damn if all the jobs are gone,
I'm gonna be a pirate on the River Saskatchewan..."(Arrrrrgh!)

'Cause it's a Heave!Ho! High!Ho!Coming down the plains
Stealing wheat and barley and all the other grains
And it's a Ho!Hey!High!Hey!Farmers bar your doors
When you see the Jolly Rancher on Regina's mighty shores

Well you'd think the local farmers would know that I'm at large
But just the other day I found an unprotected barge
I snuck up right behind them and they were None The Wiser
I rammed the ship and sank it, and I stole their fertilizer
A bridge outside of Moose Jaw spans the mighty river
Farmers cross in so much fear their stomachs are a quiver
'Cause they know that Tractor Jack is hiding in the bay
I'll jump the bridge and knock 'em cold and sail off with the hay

'Cause it's a Heave!Ho! High!Ho!Coming down the plains
Stealing wheat and barley and all the other grains
And it's a Ho!Hey!High!Hey!Farmers bar your doors
When you see the Jolly Rancher on Regina's mighty shores

Well Mountie Bob, he chased me, he was always at my throat
He'd follow on the shoreline but he didn't own a boat
But cutbacks were a comin' so the Mountie lost his job
So now he's sailin' with me and we call him "Salty Bob"
A swinging sword a scum 'n bones and pleasant company
I never pay my income tax, and screw the GST -- "Screw It!"
Prince Albert down to Saskatoon, the terror of the sea,
If you want to reach the Co-Op boy, you gotta get by me

'Cause it's a Heave!Ho! High!Ho!Coming down the plains
Stealing wheat and barley and all the other grains
And it's a Ho!Hey!High!Hey!Farmers bar your doors
When you see the Jolly Rancher on Regina's mighty shores


Well pirate life's appealing, but you don't just find me here
I've heard that in Alberta there's a band of buccaneers
They roam the Athabasca, from Smith to Fort McKay
And you're gonna loose your Stetson and if you have to pass their way
Well winter is a comin' and the chill is in the breeze
My pirate days are over once the river starts to freeze
I'll be back in springtime, but now I have to go
I hear there's lots of plundering down in New Mexico

'Cause it's a Heave!Ho! High!Ho!Coming down the plains
Stealing wheat and barley and all the other grains
And it's a Ho!Hey!High!Hey!Farmers bar your doors
When you see the Jolly Rancher on Regina's mighty shores

'Cause it's a Heave!Ho! High!Ho!Coming down the plains
Stealing wheat and barley and all the other grains
And it's a Ho!Hey!High!Hey!Farmers bar your doors
When you see the Jolly Rancher on Regina's mighty shores

'Cause it's a Heave!Ho! High!Ho!Coming down the plains
Stealing wheat and barley and all the other grains
And it's a Ho!Hey!High!Hey!Farmers bar your doors
When you see the Jolly Rancher on Regina's mighty shores

When you see the Jolly Rancher on Regina's mighty shores
When you see the Jolly Rancher on Regina's mighty shores