Cashis - Serenade My Life lyrics

Yea, uh, Shady!
Its cashis, Serenade My Life
Shady!

Focusing on opening
emotions that I hold within
surounded by my innerdemons
thinking i should roll with them
i dont wanna go to hell
i dont wanna go to jail
but i wanna kill a man
maybe i should kill myself
poppin shit, contemplating
suicidal situations
now im placed in that position
to provide the whole nation
and im spottin niggas hating
im just watchin, being patient
praying for my own *existance
some say im a mental patient
drugs is taking over me
sorrow is controlling me
follow my blind heart
tomorrow on the *cold of spring*
pop is cryin for a week
will is week, can i speak
without somebody judging me
pushin me and shovin me
moma if u love me
u will really let me go
but i live for a cause
that i dont really know
am I wrong if i cry
but i cant cause in time
for the truth in my life
i will be crucified

Chorus:
im sittin back patient(patient)
im ready and waitin(waitin)
for my homicide
serenade my life
and i cant escape it(scape it)
im ready and waitin(waitin)
for my homicide
serendade my life
X2

Conversating with my brothers
*spirit here im saying
strangers in the dark, lurking,
groupies gotta feel em waking
i aint eating, i aint sleeping
close the door and
i aint breathing
death is running over me
my concious keeps on
showing me
ever since my early teens,
music was my destiny
wolrd gotta feel my pain,
im no longer questionning
when, where or how i will,
happen for when i get killed
never take my voice away
record sales how i live
leave me as the realast nigga
poppin pills, drinkin liquor
sucked into the pressure
makes me turn to my agression
got alot a niggas dead
buried all in my head
cry inside everytime
i ever stop to read my head
cock it up, be a man
ive never been near a man
all yall fraudulent
u dont like it kill me then
cock it up, be a man
ive never been near a man
all yall fraudulent
u dont like it, kill me then

Chorus

Sunk into a sea of self--misery
being dealt
my only fear is lyracilly
me not being felt
much harder, much smarter
more true, Fuck you
no matter what the conversation
this is what it comes to
imagine staring at your friend
feeling they dont love you
u ride till the end but
they feel they above you
i got a chosen few
name my homies in the song
defy all odds
more to meet when im gone
i try to be a better man
baby if you understand
my love for you is true
but i aint really love myself
see nobody wanna help
better off to end this way
talking to my only friends
weed, G's, Hennessy
came from a broken home
smoke till the dope is gone
listen to the words homy
this aint really just a song
came from a broken home
smoke till the dope is gone
listen to the words homy
this aint really just a song

Chorus

Serenade my life
Shady Records on Ca$his
its the real shit
serenade my life
i aint scarred, i aint runnin
im waitin, come get me nigga
live as a man, die as a man