We're A Couple of Swells,
We stop at the best hotels,
But we prefer the country far away from the city smells
We're a couple of sports,
The pride of the tennis courts,
In June, July and August we look cute when we're dressed in shorts
The Vanderbilts have asked us up for tea,
We don't know how to get there, no sirr-ee
We would drive up the avenue but we haven't got the price,
We would skate up the avenue but there isn't any ice,
We would ride of a bicyle but we haven't got a bike,
So we'll walk up the avenue,
Yes we'll walk up the avenue,
'Cause to walk up the avenue's what we're like.
Wall Street bankers are we,
With plenty of currency,
We'd open up the safe but we forgot where we put the key
We're the favourite lads,
Of girls in the picture ads,
We'd like to tell you who we kissed last night but we can't be cads
The Vanderbilts are waiting at the club,
But how are we to get there, that's the rub
We would sail up the avenue but we haven't got a yacht,
We would drive up the avenue, but the horse we had was shot,
We would ride on a trolley-car, but we haven't got the fare,
So we'll walk up the avenue,
Yes we'll walk up the avenue,
Yes we'll walk up the avenue 'till we're there!