Teacher calls me ding-a-ling
Policeman calls me ding-a-ling
Street-cleaner calls me ding-a-ling
Butcher, baker, and undertaker
All call me ding-a-ling
Tweaking moocow rumps
With all their lovely lumps
Is something that I do
Infinitely better than you
Ding-a-ling
A-ring-a-ding-dong-dandy
Sometimes amnesia
Would sure come in handy
Ding-a-ling morning
Ding-a-ling night
Just stay stupid
That's all right
Bluebirds the size of sugarcubes
Circle round my head
True I have to pay them
Before I go to bed
Why'd you bring the ding-a-ling?
All she wants to do is sing
Her ding-a-ling songs
All night long
All night long
Would you like a subscription to my diary?
Then when I merge with the infinite
You can impersonate me
Would you like a subscription to my diary?
Then when I kick the bucket
You can impersonate me
Ding-a-ling morning
Ding-a-ling night
Just stay stupid
That's all right