It seems like Cho and me
Are drifting far apart
But you said you'd be my friend

And you seem really smart

As Cho grows ever distant
With her and Potter courting
I seem to notice more and more
The fabulous bows you're sporting

I really like your sweater
You look so cute in pink
When I see Cho and Harry snogging
I can't quite help but think:

Umbridge, you are really great
I don't understand the kids that hate
Dolores Umbridge, you are cool
The greatest teacher in the school
And I don't care if Cho has left
'Cause Umbridge, you're my BFF

I'm standing at your office
Please can you let me in
I really love your lacy drapes
And technicolor kittens

Dolores, can I have a word?
For just a sec or two
We can have a friendly chat
And I'll give you my views

See, Potter started this Dark Arts club
Quite some time ago
He's teaching us illegal spells, and-
HOLY SHIT THERE'S BOILS ALL OVER MY NOSE

Umbridge, you are tons of fun
On MySpace you are my Top 1
It's cool that you cause Potter woe
I don't think you look like a toad
And I don't care if Cho has left
'Cause Umbridge, you're my BFF

Let's hang out sometime

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