alphabet you $20
you'll forget that time in college
on a stiff ledge, announcing something

to a bunch of kids bent on collapsing
"for every famous last word
there are a million last words
that no one's every heard
for every famous last word
there are a million last words
and they're last words that no one's heard"

well, you got it stuck in my head
i want mine to sound smart
to ring and ring for hours
to break my mother's heart
cuz there are millions of words
that all sound like other words
i could've sworn i heard
there are millions of words
that just don't work as well as that one word

no, i think i'm cracking up
it's too polished and pretty
dishonest and lumbering
so you can keep sleeping
just break my apology
into sparks in the air you're breathing

remember when it used to be my air?
back before we fought so much
and i proved i wasn't strong enough
to convince myself into convincing you;
i was a prince before the hospital, and then
i was a trapdoor waiting to swallow you
i was a picked lock, a broken bicycle
immobilized and hanging in place
just nodding my head and hiding my face in my hands
auditioning my escape plan

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