My wife opened up her mouth hands her teeth to me-
She tell me not to return 'till I get her teeth fresh 'n clean-
Remember me to Silas tell he's filled my dance card tonight-
Remember boy I want my mouth fresh get them teeth bright white bright white-
Get them teeth bright white
I walks down center street downs the left hand side-
Silas he was gussied up in a Fauntleroy of bright bright white
Silas flashed his red wet smile say I's just the man he need
He took my tin of tailormades then he smile leavin' one for me-
leavin' one for me
Silas ask me what's I got in me hand I say they are my wife's old teeth
As he pat me down for a light he say they don't look none too clean
Silas say my tailormades he'll use 'em for the judge as bribe
Remember me to Dr. Hammer asks him if he gotta light-
if he gotta light
I walked into Dr. Hammers shop told him of the big dance contest tonight and said I didn't want my wife to be disgraced with her ol' second hand me down teeth Dr Hammer say he sure knew how to surly influence the panel he grabbed my wife's teeth from me'n shoved his fist in this can as he danced his hand around inside Doc said he saw me speaking with Silas Fauntleroy outside I only could purse my lips tight like then hammer asks if Silas got anything offen me I could only put my now empty hand over my pursin' lips then Hammer withdraws his hand and say those teeth are clean boy, but they'll taste like gasoline
Back down the center street not on the left but the right hand-
Silas liked the look of my wife's teeth said he needs to get him some of them
As Silas reached for my wife's teeth Dr. Hammer blew his Chevy on by
In this tinderbox town he found the only mud puddle dirtied up the Fauntleroy
Dirtied up the Fauntleroy
Silas cry he never'd win the dance if he go there lookin' unclean-
I strip him of his Fauntleroy'n and I dunk it in the gasoline
I return with his Fauntleroy that's once again bright white
Silas ask what about them matches I say I'll leave em' with my wife
So have a blast tonight