He said, "Abraham and Sarah could not conceive, and they began to despair
For the Lord had blessed them in their union, and promised them an heir
And yet they were childless, and in the waning years of their lives
But fortunately, in Mesopotamian tradition, a man may have many wives
So Sarah chose an Egyptian slave, and gave her over to Abraham
And she said unto him, 'I hope you are well pleased,' and he said unto her, 'I am'
And a son was born of this union between Abraham and Hagar..."
And I said, "I'm just here to, you know, get some new tires put on my car."
I'm just here
To put some new
Tires on my car
He said, "This was Ishmael from whom the Arab nations claim descent
According the promise of God to Hagar which, strictly speaking, went
Against the promise He'd given to Sarah, who now conceived
Miraculously, she said unto Abraham, and he believed
And this was Isaac, progenitor of the Hebrew people, such was his fate
And Ishmael and Isaac began to quarrel over birthright and Abraham did separate
These two brothers, chosen by God, spared by God, forever in God's debt..."
And I said, "I'm just gonna see if they've done my alignment yet."
I'm gonna see
If they've done
My alignment yet
And he said, "Moses as an infant was hidden in the rushes and forgotten
And grew up in monotheistic faith, which some might say Akhenaton
Had put forth a century before, and Moses, as we know, went
On to speak directly to God at Sinai and bear the covenant
And to be cited by Mohammed in the Glorious Koran
Mohammed, who spoke to God through the angel Gabriel in the month of Ramadan
And Jesus was born of the line of David in Bethlehem to give
His life in a new covenant, a new promise of God that Man might live
And Mohammed said that, verily, they who believe in the Lord
Be they Muslim or Jewish or Christian, and do what is right, shall have their reward
And so you have all these religious factions of this prophet or that king
But descended from two brothers and one God, and here's the thing
It seems like a really stupid reason to blow up anyone..."
And I said, "Hey, you're right. You're really right. I think my car is done."
Hey, you're right
Really right
I think my car is done