Album: This Is My Dinner
Arrived last night to the dark city of Oslo
Along the highway to the hotel, Ben pointed out the snow
I stepped outside the taxi, the cold air pinched my arms
I recall many times of coming here before and playing shows in Oslo
And all those times in Norway, I’ve had positive associations
Even when I played at the So What Club with my band, the Red House Painters
And my times playing there solo acoustic
There was always a tall redhead in front of me, staring really weird
The guy from the Kings of Convenience
I remember taking off with
When her boyfriend came knocking on the back door
He was out for blood
She sent me out the front door and I ran down the cold streets
Watching over my shoulder, my heart was beating fast
I was worried for my life
And I was young and I was and I had no regrets about
When you’re in your twenties, in my opinion, nothing is off limits
I don’t really know what her boyfriend’s problem even was
Nothing was going on
We were just making sweet, passionate love
The memorable drive in my life ever was from Berlin to Oslo
There were no signs of life
Now and then, just a single bird or a boat
There were ominous silver-black mountains
Shining off in the distance along the water
And in the moment I knew Norway had a market on death mountains
I think the Moomintrolls were still in that area, from what I could remember
But its beauty can not be captured in pictures
Every time I play there in Norway, it’s been a special time
I play all the cities in Norway
Not just Bergen or Oslo, but also Trondheim
The only ones I never really loved, if you’ll allow me to be candor
Are the cities of Tonsberg and Stavanger
Too many dudes with their eyes glued to their phone
I remember telling them the importance of having relationships
But it seemed low on their priorities
My worst memory of Norway was playing a festival in Giske
I got a call that my cat lost her ability to walk
And my cat is very sick
I loved that cat more than anything in the world
She shared that bed with me for sixteen years
She was my entire world
So I booked an expensive ticket out of the island of Giske
Hopelessly getting home to see my cat
Before she took her last breath
The whole thing was so upsetting
All these agonies building up on the plane
I kept praying in my journal, «Kitty, please don’t die on me
Please don’t die on me when I’m up there in the sky
I’ll beat myself up forever if I could not kiss you goodbye»
But she waited for me, when I finally got to my house
My cat was laying there lifeless on my couch
I tore up about all she meant to me, all the joys she gave me
If there’s a god out there, I pray to him that she heard me
But of course, I remember my beautiful visits to Oslo
Everyone asking who the girl is in that song
She knows who she is, and it would spoil things to tell it
Leave the song alone, don’t ask questions about it, just enjoy it
Leave the song alone, make your own connections with it
Leave the song alone, don’t you ever try to overanalyze it
Leave the song alone, a song is a song
Don’t dissect it like a dead frog
Leave the song alone, do not dissect it in your mom’s house
In the basement, on your blog
I got a lot of friends in Norway
My heart was broken when I heard about the guy who bombed Norway
He killed all the little children on their summer vacation
Everyone in America was complaining about how his sentence was light
But this shit happens every week in America
So your country is doing something right
I hate to bring this subject up
Because it causes my stomach to get sick and tight
My point is that the country of Norway is peaceful
And you are all doing something right
I love all of Norway, and how you do Christmas right
Three candles in the window, it’s so subtle and nice
When I tell Scandinavians how good they’ve got it
They all roll their eyes and say
«Well, it’s dark here all winter and it gets very depressing»
I’m gonna tell you something Norway, this is no lie
I’ve traveled the world and Norwegians have the most beautiful eyes
The only thing living that ever had more beautiful eyes than you
Was my precious little cat, her eyes were green and blue
I miss you to death, but I want to thank promoter Brent Jacobs
My friend and a writer from Norway
He’s a beautiful and very caring person who arranged
My flight to California for me and other guests
So I could get home to my cat and give her one last kiss
And I remember a time when I played this exact same venue
Some guy in the back got up and shouted
«Mark, I have something to tell you»
I said, «What is it?» and he said, «I hate your fucking guts»
Then he rushed off like a little bitch in a huff
I told him, «I hope when you cross the street, you get hit by a fucking bus»
But he insulted me first
And on tour, you gotta understand I don’t sleep too much
You have to understand that what I said, that was not me
We all have our moments and that guy was sniffing glue or something
Anyhow, I’m over it, I love you all and that’s no lie
Of all the countries I’ve played in this world
Yours is the most organized, of course
And the fjords are so beautiful and the salmon melts in your mouth
And the girls are stunning
Even the three who I met in Stavanger, down south
There’s one I’ll never forget
She promoted my show, how can I not remember?
She showed me a Snickers bar and said, «This is my dinner»
I said, «If you like, I could give you a few hundred Norwegian kroner»
She said, «No, it wouldn’t be right for me to take your money»
And that was the last time I ever saw her
That was the last time I ever saw her, and back to the verse
And my favorite memory of Norway was playing the in Bergen
There was an old man named Dennis and we got to talking
He had a contagious smile
And we shared a bottle of water and a loaf of bread
It wasn’t much of a conversation
It was more like a one-sided monologue from Dennis
But I listened very close to Dennis
Because he was older and wiser than me
Dennis' last name is Reckson
He doesn’t have a Facebook and neither do I
So if you see him, please tell him Mark Kozelek says hi
And tell him I said god bless him
Thank you Oslo and Norway for coming out tonight
The five of us are happy to be here
Playing music on this cold November night
Sharing music with you, this is what I dreamed about all my life