I sent her a letter that was smart and funny
she said, "that's nice baby, now show me the money"
so i spent lots of cash when i took her out
but she said, "It's What's Inside That Counts"

i'm just any dude
(she's a clever girl, she's a clever girl)
i'm just any dude
(she's a special girl, a deep and special girl)

so i opened up my heart, yeah i broke out the tissues
unimpressed, she said, "you've got issues"

i'm just any dude
(she's a pleasant girl, a light and pleasant girl)

i'm just any dude
(she's a quiet girl, she's a quiet girl)

so i laughed and i charmed, acting witty and such
but she just yawned and said, "you talk too much"
she says looks don't matter or expensive toys
but all her ex-lovers look like backstreet boys
twenty minutes after she said, "let's be friends"
she was dancing in the nude with a loser again

the only way with you is an ugly goodbye

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