In fall, the year you grew to be six feet
I tempered my fear into haste
A worry that dogged our mother
She, the baby of three, asked how
So many things could take flight at once
There are no easy answers, and even thirteen, i Could not think of a sure reply
At the church where i was baptized
Our father refused to park near the crowd
At that time, i still believed in god, or faeries
Or that the air could catch on fire
When you and your friends took off on separate routes
I wanted to follow you
But our mother said i was not allowed to You had not yet learned how to fill such a broad frame
That winter you said you hated your body
But when spring came, you’d learned how to speak
And you moved west
To watch the ocean eat the coast away
I can still remember that day you left
Thoughts spilling out from my chest
Like, «who will you be when you come back»
Or even, «will you come back?»