She climbs a tree
And scrapes her knee
Her dress has got a tear
She waltzes on her way to mass and whistles on the stair
And underneath her wimple
She has curlers in her hair
Maria's not an asset to the abbey
She's always late for chapel
But her penitence is real
She's always late for everything,
Except for every meal Mother Abbess From all of wich, I take it,
That you firmly feel
Maria's not an asset to the abbey!
I'd like to say a word on her behalf.
Maria makes me laugh!
How do you solve a problem like Maria?
How do you catch a cloud and bring it down?
How do you find a word that means Maria?
A flibberti gibbet!
A willo' the wisp!
A clown!
Many a thing you know you'd like to tell her,
many a thing she ought to understand
But how do you make her stay and listen to all you say
How do you keep a wave upon the sand?
Oh, how do you solve a problem like Maria?
How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?
When I'm dazed and confused,
out of focus and bemused,
and I never know exactly where
I am Unpredictable as weather,
she's as flightly as a feather
She's a darling
She's a demon
She's a lamb
Se'd out-pester any pest,
drive a hornet from his nest
She could throw a whirling dervish out of whirl
She is gentle, she is wild She's a riddle
She's a child
She's a headache!
She's an angel
She's a girl
How do you solve a problem like Maria?
How do you catch a clown and pin it down?
How can you find a word that means Maria?
A flibberti gibbet!
A willo' the wisp!
A clown!
Many a thing you know you'd like to tell her
Many a thing she ought to understand
But how do you make her stay
And kisten to all you say?
How do you keep a wave upon the sand?
Oh, how do you solve a problem like Maria?
How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?

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