I was doing alright
I've been well behaved
Bad things out of my life
I thought I was saved
I was gone so long
Hard at work on tour
Got my cable turned back on
Didn't know what was in store
I turned on the TV
And suddenly they were in front of me
Changed the channel
They were on all the shows
It made my brain explode
Speidi free
Is the way it should be
Get them off of my TV
Before I upchuck my coffee
Someone rescue me
Will someone hear my plea
Torture of the worst degree
The world should be
Speidi free
Listen Heidi gril
You need to get a clue
Your song "Body Language"
Is no "Slave 4 you"
And mister Spencer Pratt
You think your so adored
But everytime you speak
It's like nails on a cahlk board
We could send them off
In an air balloon
That would never stop
Until it reaches the moon
We could lock them away
In a submarine
Then up here on land
It would be so serene
Speidi free
Is the way it should be
Get them off of my TV
Before I upchuck my coffee
Someone rescue me
Will someone hear my plea
Torture of the worst degree
The world should be
Speidi free
What I say is not in vain
It's just that they will mel your brain
Your eyes will pop, your ears will blow
So to Speidi just say no
Just say no
Make them go
Away!