This is our seventh record
Third on our second label
No money has changed hands
There's still no food on our table
Somehow we're on a major
Does not mean that we've sold out
Cos first we'd have to sell some
And bargain bins do not count

We'll throw a party on the deck as our ship sinks
Let the countdown to our being dropped begin
We'll sure for discrimination
Finally we'll see some
Dollars for our degradation

Total Commercial Failure

We put out our last record
Got heaps of nice reviews
Somebody should have told us
Punk records are not for jews
They prefer top 20
Or crappy folk rock anthems
They'd probably disown us
If they ever paid attention

We're having too much fun
Won't ever write a number one
Cos most of what we do
Turns out commercial number two
But what's wrong with failure
When it still serves to entertain
Its not art or music
So long as it amuses you
So please don't count on us
We do not try avoid success
Can't you see like we must
It is success avoiding us
So where to who can tell
We could be flipping burgers still
We'll be here and so
See you at the next show!

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